Monday, October 26, 2009

Mistakes

Now at the age of 22! Alot of things go through my mind. I try my best to NOT dwell on the past, but its alot of things that eat a part of me away "smdh" I can't fucking help it. I've made alot of dumb decisions and mistakes. Whether it was hanging out with the wrong crowd of people, going the wrong places and just being at the wrong place at the wrong time. As I got older I've realized "It is what it is" I figure it all happened for a reason. I haven't made any real bad, bad mistakes. Like going to jail, having a child at a young age, catching a std and etc..I was raised with some sense haha. My whole life growing up I've been a pessimist. Now all that negative vibes is steady fading away. My subconscious mind is on a peak to gain its all time high, but Im just not making those big power moves in life like I should've made.

I'm going to get where I'm at soon! I'm a very unique individual. You couldn't compare me to alot of men out here. My mindset is so far ahead of these guys out here. I just need to progress more I've learned from alot of my mistakes. "hmph" Believe me, although I feel like I've took the wrong path in life. Im not going to blame it on friends and partying and etc..at the time when I just felt free and kinda didn't have a worry for the world in some sort of way. The mistakes I've made have let loved one's down. One thing I hate is letting people down, because I know how it feels. In other words "bluffing" I learn that we all make mistakes, but you make more mistakes doing nothing in life. I know we all don't have consummate qualities, but we all can work on these skills to propel to open doors. Not just for our own pleasures, but for others as well. People who know me think I want to sit home on the damn computer all day and live on the Eastern Shore working on a minimum wage myy whole life "no offense"? Nooohhh!! I have dreams and goals like everybody else to to achieve dammit. I feel that Im missing something in my life. I just don't know what it is yet tho.. one thing I will say, "Its wonderful feeling to have someone at your side who will be there with you on that journey, that we call life"

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